This case was ruled on October 15, 2014, by the Honorable Judge, Krayot Family Court, Mr. Nitsan Silman (Court Case No. 37245-07-13).
Here’s what happens when the courts believes that they can force a parent to be a good and active parent:
There are the misconceptions in the Israeli court rooms today regarding “visitation rights”, or as the courts see it, “visitation obligations” of the father.
In the following case, a father of two minors refused to see them for approximately two months. Reluctantly, the mother attempted to communicate with his family and eventually even agreed to reduce his maintenance payments to her (alimony), provided that he meet with his daughters, but to no avail. Even the constant pleas from social workers and from the judge did not succeed in convincing the father to change his mind. Therefore the courts decided to impose punitive sanctions on the father.
The judge made sure to clarify to the father the need for ongoing interactions between a father and his daughters and he made sure to include in his ruling that “these visitations are part of the crucial development of the girls”.
Make no mistake about it. What we see in the court protocols are only a mere glimpse into what was happening outside the courts between the parents and prior to the judge’s decision. The couple was constantly fighting about many other critical issues amongst them including many issues relating to the girls education.
In his ruling the Judge also stated that:
“There are some cases that the legal system simply cannot ignore. Disconnecting from ones children causes damage to their delicate beings especially when taking into account that these children are already sensitive due to the breakup of their core family unit. This also causes harm to the active parent who has had to cope with the increased challenges of their children and their treatment due to the ongoing absence of their other parent.”
Among his rulings in this case, the Judge also ruled that: “Every time the father doesn’t see his children as stipulated in their agreement, a 350 shekel fine will be added on to the child support he currently pays”.
My question to you is not whether or not you can obligate a parent to be a “good and active parent” or to even expect them to simply keep their part of the visitation obligations by seeing their kids when they are supposed to since the answer is simple and obvious. You cannot.
To me the real question is if whether or not these penalties will change anything for the betterment of the children.
One can only hope so.
It is obvious that pressure and court ordered penalties will most likely result in greater hostility from the parent being penalized and that the increased hostility will probably destroy any chance of eventually coming to an amicable compromise.
The Bottom Line is this. This case is not unique. It is a large part of the new approach in the court rooms to joint, but separate, parenting in Israel today. The courts are looking to fulfill and look after the needs of the kids in any way possible disregarding the fact that the parents who are responsible for them also might have rights and needs. The legal system is not able, at this time, to give credence to the needs of parents, even though they are the ones fulfilling these children’s needs. Let’s watch and see how this new forceful approach takes shape in the near future.
